THE INSTITUTE FOR GRIEF MASSAGE INC
ouroboroslogo.jpg

Blog of The Institute for Grief Massage Inc

The Institute for Grief Massage Inc blog features articles and posts about grief massage therapy, spirituality, and honoring ones calling. Read about our grief massage therapy training program, and be inspired to help support grieving clients through massage.

COVID-19 & Acting from Concern Versus Fear

IMPORTANT NOTE: For the latest up-to-date information on COVID-19, please visit the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) here.

As I write this, our world is in a state of uncertainty.

A pandemic has been declared. A new and mysterious virus has become a threat to all humans on the planet- notably, some much more than others.

To understand how we humans may be feeling and responding to all of this, let’s first turn our attention to the nervous system. Our nervous systems are wired to respond to threat by enacting survival responses.

Threats like COVID-19 Can Trigger Survival Responses

Commonly, we humans respond to threat by fighting or by attempting to escape (flee).If these options are not viable, our human nervous system can sink into a deeper survival response state of “freeze” or numb immobilization.

What might this look like in response to COVID 19? What might a fighting response be like? A fleeing response? A freezing response?

What have you seen in your own community? At the grocery store? On the news? How has your own behavior in this time of uncertainty reflected nervous system survival responses?

Keep in mind that instinctual survival responses are evolutionary. They are - in a way- our birthright as humans, as they are how our ancestors survived. And here’s the thing. Fear can literally take over when we feel activated and threatened. We aren’t bad or wrong for this. We are human.

But, when we are triggered into a fight, flight or freeze survival response it is so easy to ACT from fear.

Why it matters is this: it is difficult to access our deepest wisdom, our rational capacities, and the executive functions of our human brains when we are coming from a place of fear.

If, in situations such as the pandemic we face, we can move into a nervous system state of connection and safety (which admittedly may sound impossible as we navigate a situation marked by isolation, quarantines and social distancing), then we CAN begin to access our best rational decision making capabilities, along with our deepest wisdom and values.

Concern and Connection Rather Than Fear

Again, I see this through the lens of the human nervous system. If we can pause in the midst of panic and find ways to shift into a state of felt safety and connection, we can begin to access the parts of our human brain that we most need in this situation.

When we do this, we can begin to act from concern and connection rather than simply from fear.

How can we move into a state of safety and connection? Some thoughts:

Touch- Although many health experts are recommending that handshakes and other physical contact be limited at this time, we do still have the ability to engage in a self-compassion practice.

A simple tool I use often in my own self compassion practice is placing my own hand over my heart. An alternate way to use touch to increase feelings of safety can be to simply hug yourself. As long as you are avoiding touching your eyes, nose and mouth and are practicing proper hand washing, this seems to be a safe practice in this situation we face.

I really appreciate Dr. Kristin Neff (researcher and self-compassion pioneer) for offering self-compassion exercises and practice on her website, www.self-compassion.org. Here’s a link to her self-compassion practice utilizing support touch.

Music- An interview I recently heard with Stephen Porges, founder of the Polyvagal Theory, fascinated me when he spoke of how prosodic tones (think of folk music and guitar music) can be soothing to the human nervous system.

Generally, according to the Polyvagal Theory, voices and tones that reflect emotion are perceived as “safe” by our nervous system. So, if you can listen to music or guided meditations with soothing prosodic tones, you may find that your nervous system shifts into a more settled state of safety and connection. Personally, one of my favorite go to guided meditations is Shakti Gawain’s “Creative Visualization”. Her voice is so calm, melodic and soothing to my nervous system.

Images- It’s important to stay informed in this rapidly changing landscape. So, refusing to watch the news is not a reasonable response.

And, at the same time I also believe it is vital to take periodic breaks from the crisis images on the news to focus on what can stimulate feelings of safety and connection for our nervous system.

Perhaps looking at images of loved ones (or FaceTiming with them) will be restorative for the nervous system. Or, perhaps going on YouTube and watches videos of puppies, kittens or cute babies will stimulate this response. Find images that are soothing to your system and take regular breaks from news coverage.

Why It Matters

Moving into a nervous system state of safety and connection is not just about feeling better (although that is important too).

It’s also about moving from the fear-based part of our brain, and into the rational, wise creative part of our brain where our best responses arise (the prefrontal cortex).

Acting from concern instead of fear does not mean that we ignore this pandemic. It does not mean that we take it less seriously.

Rather, I believe it means that we move into decision making from a state that allows access to the best and most rational parts of ourselves. And, I believe acting from concern allows us to move into actions that arise from feelings of connection- not isolation - toward others.

The word concern has several meanings, and the one I appreciate the most is from the Medieval Latin concernere which meant “concern, touch, belong to” according to the Online Etymological Dictionary.

Belonging to Each Other

This pandemic is a time where we truly must belong to each other, this is a time when we have a new awareness of how connected we all are as humans- especially how we are connected in vulnerability.

The decisions we make during this time will impact others. We have a shared responsibility to take care with our actions. We have an opportunity to belong to each other.

When we allow ourselves to shift into a nervous system state of connection and safety, we can make decisions that arise out of a true sense of belonging to each other.

This pandemic can be extremely complicated for those of us in the bodywork profession.

When touch is at the center of our work, and is how we earn our livelihood, we may feel confused and frightened about how to make decisions related to keeping businesses open or not.

Bodyworkers are facing the threat of the pandemic itself plus the threat to their ability to do the work they love and to their ability to support themselves and their families - to make a living.

Fear can take over here in many ways- there may be a fight, flee or even a freeze response to the decision making process around continuing to see clients.

To make the wisest decisions in this landscape, I again urge you to tune into your nervous system and consciously act from concern rather than fear. I urge you to act from a place of belonging to each other, from a place of awareness of how our individual actions can -and will- impact the whole.

Calm, ground and center.

Then do the work of making decisions from a place of love, concern and connection.

Gathering Information for Decision Making

Gathering information can be difficult right now. This is an unprecedented situation and it may feel like clear guidance and reliable answers are out of reach.

Some sources to consider as you gather information at this time may include your local health department, your state massage therapy board, professional associations and national agencies like the Centers for Disease Control (CDC).

UPDATE: As of March 16, 2020, the professional association, Associated Bodywork & Massage Professionals, posted an article stating “We strongly encourage you to suspend your practice on a short-term temporary basis”. Read the full article, along with a statement from pathology expert Ruth Werner (who has now advised massage therapists to “shut it down”) here.

UPDATE: As of March 17, 2020, the professional association, The American Massage Therapy Association posted an article stating “AMTA does not have the authority to stop you from practicing massage, but firmly believes massage therapists should be part of the solution and do no harm. At this time, we believe the best way that therapists can contribute to the solution is by only practicing massage that is medically necessary and by supporting the recent federal guidelines as outlined in the 15 Days to Slow the Spread initiative thru at least March 31.” Read the full article, plus updates on AMTA’s efforts to support efforts to aid massage therapists economically in the wake of COVID-19 here.

A resource I have personally found especially helpful in my own decision making has been an article written about COVID-19 by concerned physicians. This article, “A COVID-19 Coronavirus Update from Concerned Physicians” clearly outlines a rationale for current recommendations for social distancing in a way that helped me in my own decision making process at this time.

This article opens by stating:

“Evidence matters. Unfortunately, evidence is often slow, methodical, and boring and has a tough time against clicky headlines and exaggeration. We believe that an accurate representation of the current COVID-19 pandemic followed by a set of actionable steps you, your loved ones, politicians, and local officials can utilize is of paramount importance and ultimately could save tens of thousands of lives.”

I encourage you to read this article from a place of concern and “belonging to each other” rather than a place of panic and fear.

My own decision at this time has been to refrain from providing any bodywork in the coming week. I will reevaluate in one week based on the guidance available at that time.

This is my decision and I have based it on the information in the article mentioned above, as well as my own sense that I am acting from a place of love and concern for the whole by limiting physical contact at this vulnerable and uncertain time.

Undeniably there is privilege inherent in my ability to feel safe making this decision. I have a partner whose income is stable and largely will be unaffected (at least for now) by the pandemic. I honor all of the complicated ways that a decision to refrain from physical contact might land for all of the massage therapists and body workers out there.

This pandemic hits extremely close to home. I hope these thoughts open up some possibilities and options for each of you as you make decisions and navigate a response to COVID-19.

Be gentle with yourself. Act from concern not fear. Remember that we belong (now perhaps more than ever) to each other.

References

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention(CDC). Coronavirus (COVID-19). Online: https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-nCoV/index.html

Luks, H.J., Topf, J., Weiss, E.J., Swanson, W.S., Vartabedian, B, Diulus, C, Shipley, N.Y. & Levi, E. (March 14, 2020). A COVID-19 coronavirus update from concerned physicians. Online: https://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2020/03/a-covid-19-coronavirus-update-from-concerned-physicians.html

Neff, K. Exercise 4: Supportive Touch. Self Compassion. Accessed March 16, 2020. Online: https://self-compassion.org/exercise-4-supportive-touch/

Online Etymological Dictionary. Concern. Online: https://www.etymonline.com/search?q=concern

Article updated March 16, 2020, March 17, 2020, March 19, 2020

Aimee Taylor
Privacy Policy Cookie Policy